Open Letters – A Postscript to My Neighbor’s Cat

Dear TDC,

I asked you nicely to stop pooping in my flower beds.  I’ve given you a year+ to cease and desist, and yet. . .

I’m writing you to let you know that the next time you visit your toilet, AKA my yard, you will find chicken wire beneath the newly placed mulch.  I’ve also put down “cat repellent” that smells an awful lot like pepper spray + coyote urine, and yet, and yet it still smells better than your parting gifts.

Please take the hint and fail to find a new place to poop on this side of my fence, lest you make me consider my personal policy on owning firearms.
Most kindly,

The Lady in the Pink Robe with the Garden Hose in the Blue House


    • I don’t know who owns it! It lives on the much more crowded street behind our house – it could belong to ANYONE. Also, I don’t see it very often, but it’s left copious evidence of the time it spends in my yard – presumably after dark.

  1. I sympathize with you on this one. We have two cat visitors, so I just bought some spray that smells like citrus that’s supposed to work. I can tell you it was too strong to use in the house to make my cat avoid a piece of furniture because the smell permeated the whole house and made her hide under the bed.

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